Sunday, October 14, 2007

Moustache Diary, Entry #10

Nothing to report really, just some observations.

You know when you get a new (to you) car? Or when you’re first thinking about shopping for a particular vehicle? Good times, right?

Well, during these rare moments you might have found yourself inner dialoging. Something along the lines of, “The Buick LeSabre is the car for me. I think I’ll go for the 1999 model.”

And at that fateful Excalibur moment, you open your eyes a little wider, start looking around, and — lo and behold — all you see are 1999 Buick LeSabres.

Everywhere.

“Hey, I didn’t know they made them in maroon!” Or, “That one’s seen better days.” Or, “Oh, man! Spoked hubcaps? That’s a nice option!” And the next thing you know you’re the proud owner of your own LeSabre.

By the way … did you know that LeSabre really means The Sabre?

Anyway, as so often happens when you purchase a new (to you) LeSabre, you might start waving at the other LeSabre owners and giving them affirmative nods and raising your eyebrows at them as you meet on the streets. Hell, you might even park by that other LeSabre at the grocery store just because there’s an open spot next to it.

Okay — to make a long story long — I’m not saying my moustache is on the level of breathtaking amazingness that the 1999 Buick LeSabre occupies. Far from it. But I have noticed that a moustache can produce an eye-opening phenomenon similar to the one a new (to you) automobile generates.

In the act of toting this ’stache around these last few weeks, I’ve seen the best and worst of hairy upper lips that the world has to offer. Giant noble works of art and wimpy starter kits. I’ve seen mangy, scrappy, patchy, and I’ve seen full-blown, well-maintained, major-league epicness.
I’ve even gotten some head nods and some raised eyebrows.

Yeah, it’s all been super interesting. I’m sure you agree.

But to tell you the god’s honest truth, I’m beyond all that.

Now I'm keeping my eyes peeled for a rare sociable wave from the driver of a pristine LeSabre ... one that, upon closer examination, is being delivered by a walrus-y Wilford Brimley kind of person.

Yeah. Some of that when-worlds-collide type shit.

7 comments:

sda said...

i'm on to you man. your going as borat for halloween aren't you? aren't you?

mw said...

you should have mrs. kw comment on kissing that face...

ButchieCantaloupe said...

I have an uncle you should meet. Mad stach' man MAD stach'...

elisabeth said...

as the regular kisser of a very cultivated, curled moustache, i must say it takes practice

Katie Leyden said...

I think you have reached the major league with that thing. you can stop growing it now...it's here. -Katie

sockrider said...

are you a cop now?

MG said...

i can verify that he's most definitely not a cop.

but that is a nice stach kev.

see ya' tonight,
mg